My gaoler required a great deal of refreshment after the wearisome day she had past; which prevented her coming to bed very early, and gave me leisure to weep myself almost into a state of stupefaction. This was the most desirable condition I could be in. My persecutor looked into my close-drawn bed-curtains, and vented some reproaches; but feeing me scarcely sensible, she would not throw away such precious words, and went to her rest.

As day began to break, I fell into more lively terrors, fearing I should again be exposed to see, and be seen by, Mr. Merton; which was the most dreadful circumstance imaginable to me, as it occasioned both the greatest apprehensions and self-reproaches.

When my gaoler awaked, she called to me to rise. I was hardly able to obey her; so much was I spent with the violence of my fits the day before: But she quickened my feeble motions with the harshest expressions; and fear restored part of the strength of which it had deprived me. After frequent efforts, she found it was impossible for me to get down-stairs without help; but not condescending to assist me, she called two of the footmen, who supported me to the coach, and lifted me into it; for the fear of seeing Mr. Merton there, as I approached it, deprived me entirely of the little strength I had remaining.

Surely all mental sufferings put together cannot make so great a sum of misery as a mixture of anxiety and fear, such as I at that moment felt. I verily think, if Mr. Merton had then appeared, nature must have been totally overcome with the shock; but the shutting of the door after the housekeeper got into the coach to me, gave me breath. I took it as an indication that we were to perform the rest of our journey without him; but durst not ask if my hopes were well grounded.