Book contents
- Frontmatter
- Miscellaneous Frontmatter
- INTRODUCTION
- Frontispiece
- Love, Grime And Johannesburg
- Scene 1 A Public Square
- Scene 2 The Prison Cell
- Scene 3 The Office of the Chief of Police
- Scene 4 The Prison Cell.
- Scene 5 A City Council Boardroom
- Scene 6 The Prison Cell
- Scene 7 Bokkie's Study
- Scene 8 The Prison Cell
- Scene 9 A Melville
- Scene 10 Office of the Chief of Police
- Scene 11 The Open Door
- Scene 12 The Prison Cell
- Scene 13 A Melville Cafe
- Scene 14 A Melville Cafe.
- Scene 15 The Prison Cell
- Scene 16 Office Corridors
- Scene 17 Bokkie's Study
- Scene 18 A Melville Cafe
- Scene 19 The Prison Cell
- Scene 20 The Doorway
- Scene 21 A Melville Cafe
- Scene 22 The Office of the Chief of Police
- Scene 23 A Cheap Bruma Lake Hotel Room
- Scene 24 The Public Square
Scene 5 - A City Council Boardroom
Published online by Cambridge University Press: 04 June 2019
- Frontmatter
- Miscellaneous Frontmatter
- INTRODUCTION
- Frontispiece
- Love, Grime And Johannesburg
- Scene 1 A Public Square
- Scene 2 The Prison Cell
- Scene 3 The Office of the Chief of Police
- Scene 4 The Prison Cell.
- Scene 5 A City Council Boardroom
- Scene 6 The Prison Cell
- Scene 7 Bokkie's Study
- Scene 8 The Prison Cell
- Scene 9 A Melville
- Scene 10 Office of the Chief of Police
- Scene 11 The Open Door
- Scene 12 The Prison Cell
- Scene 13 A Melville Cafe
- Scene 14 A Melville Cafe.
- Scene 15 The Prison Cell
- Scene 16 Office Corridors
- Scene 17 Bokkie's Study
- Scene 18 A Melville Cafe
- Scene 19 The Prison Cell
- Scene 20 The Doorway
- Scene 21 A Melville Cafe
- Scene 22 The Office of the Chief of Police
- Scene 23 A Cheap Bruma Lake Hotel Room
- Scene 24 The Public Square
Summary
LULU, dressed in a male suit, pin striped and beautifully cut, makes a presentation to an imaginary Greater City Council.
LULU: Think of Johannesburg. Greater Johannesburg. South of Soweto, from Orange Farm to the border of Midrand in the north. The place looks like a kidney, like a sort of squashed kidney. Think of the Ml north. Think of the east. Benoni, Brakpan, Boksburg. Think of the great cities of the world. Rome, Paris, Beijing, Buenos Aires, London, New York, Johannesburg!
Johannesburg is the largest city in the world not built on a river!
This is why we're mad! This is why the city is crazy! We need water!
Madam chair, city councillors, Central City Solutions propose the following - we are going to change the Ml into a river and replace Benoni, Boksburg and Brakpan with a sea!
Our consulting engineers assure us that all entrances to the Ml can be easily dammed up and with a few minor pumps we can make the river flow all the way to Pretoria.
To tell you the truth, we're not really sure which city is lower - Jo'burg or Pretoria - but this, I'm assured by the engineers is a minor detail.
You know the sea at Sun City? How it waves and crashes? We've been told by the engineers that we can create about thirty or forty of those and nobody will ever know it's man made.
Unfortunately moving Benoni, Boksburg and Brakpan is a little harder!
THE COMPANY sings:
GAUTENG
Gauteng Go monate (3) It's lovely in Gauteng
Go monate mo Gauteng
Ditsotsi tsa mo a di sa dlala
ma- dice
Di rpoa di banka di bolaya batho
Maginsta ka dithunya le di car hijack
House breaker, jack roller
House breaker, jack roller,
Tshaba di fedile
Mo Gauteng
Gauteng Go monate (3)
Go monate mo Gauteng
To stroll at night is to take a risk
They break your back and empty your pockets
Boys and girls, it's just the same
Tsotsis don't gamble
with
dice any more
They rob banks and kill
people
Guys with guns and car
hijacking
The nation is finished
- Type
- Chapter
- Information
- Love, Crime and Johannesburg , pp. 16 - 17Publisher: Wits University PressPrint publication year: 2000