The first three months of my tenure as Minister of State for Administrative Reform were nothing short of strange. Instead of seeing me during working hours at the presidential office Bina Graha as he did with other ministers, President Soeharto liked to summon me to his private residence in Jalan Cendana in the evening. Odder still, during those night-time meetings, never once did he bring up the matter of my portfolio or duties, preferring to dwell on colourful past events that he wanted to talk about.

I decided to ask Vice President Sudharmono and the Minister of Defence and Security L.B. “Benny” Moerdani why I was being treated differently. The two senior figures in government were in agreement— that the President was trying to size me up, with a view to making me part of his inner circle, commonly known as the Cendana Group.

Both of them also cautioned me that being in the inner circle was a great burden, going by their own experiences during the 1988 General Session of the People's Consultative Assembly (MPR). But they also told me that I alone had to decide whether or not I wanted this course.

I mulled over what they had said for some time before resolving to choose the “Middle Course”. Consequently, I decided to send a clear signal to the President that I wished merely to serve as minister, and not to be inducted into the inner circle. My opportunity arrived when the President started telling me some very private matters about himself, which I thought was inappropriate between a President and his minister.

At that moment, I made up my mind to speak up. I pointed out to him that I had been minister for three months but never once had he informed me of what he expected me to do in that capacity. I also told him frankly that I was uncomfortable with discussing private affairs.

As he listened to my declaration, I noticed the President's face becoming tense. He then said rather curtly, “Please have a drink!” I knew this was an unmistakable signal that our conversation was over. It was therefore with relief that the next time he summoned me it was to Bina Graha at 10 a.m.

We had a thorough and productive discussion on my department's new supervisory programme for government departments known as “Pengawasan Melekat”. At our first “proper” meeting, I formed a clear impression that the President was very well informed about government policy and was in full mastery of his brief as both head of state and government.