This chapter explores a set of marginal characters of topmost importance: hats. The marginality of hat study is all too apparent; it smacks of esoteric trivia. I argue that such a commonsensical assumption is at odds with Conrad’s fictional hats: their variety, number and position in the texts. From the bowler to the Bersagliere, there are more than twenty-five types of hat in his fiction. They are used for fiddling, collecting nails, catching butterflies, transporting cakes, holding strips of beef, carrying secret messages, and saving a “homeless head from the dangers of the sun.” Conrad leaves us with the idea that while we may think that we wear hats, hats are clothed in meaning and may even wear us; there is no clear boundary between object and person; an everyday material object can be a key to understanding a complex individual and vice versa.