A generational divide exists between parents’ understanding of what their children know about sex and relationships and what their children have experienced online and ‘in real life’. Ironically, although we live in a hypersexualised world, parents often do not realise that they are their children's sex educators and can be unaware of the consequences of relinquishing that role and responsibility to other influences. Children and young people (CYP) learn not only in the classroom, in the playground and from their surrounding culture, but also from what they find or are shown online (Livingstone et al, 2017). From an increasingly young age, children are exposed to sex and relationships topics through the media, social media, the internet, sexting and pornography. However, their moral compass will still be their parents’ values and perspectives. In talking openly at home parents can improve their children's mental health, reinforce safeguarding and strengthen the parent–child connection. Parental engagement is the crucial missing link in sex education.
Outspoken Sex Ed – a social enterprise focused on giving parents the language, skills, knowledge and confidence to talk openly with their children about sex, bodies, consent and relationships – was founded on the conviction that CYP have a right to accurate information about sex and relationships that addresses their curiosity, desire and need to understand the bigger sex-education picture. In encouraging parents to look back at their own formative sex education and reflect on their current attitudes, it aims to help them take inspiration from their hopes for their children's positive sex and relationships experiences. ‘The best support and protection parents can offer young people,’ suggested author and comedian Sara Pascoe, ‘is ensuring they have all the information they need to make decisions about their health, body, sexual exploration and emotions – which is what Outspoken is all about’ (Outspoken Sex Ed, nd).
The need for informing CYP about sex and relationships topics is increasingly urgent. Continuing to make headlines are, for instance, the rise in unwanted touching at school (Women and Equalities Committee, 2016), in sexual harassment among children (National Education Union and UK Feminista, 2017) and in child-on-child sexual abuse – up by 71 per cent in 2017 (Guardian, 2017);