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On Politeness

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Summary

C. Civility and Politeness are due to every one; and you have done wrong in thus violently transgressing their bounds.

A. I deny that I have transgressed. I know well enough what civility is due to others, and in this instance at least I have given it.

C. Do you really conceive that you behaved politely, when you told him, in three or four words, that he was mean?—that he grasped so hard and hastily in dealing with his friend, as well as the world as to evince a mean disposition?—Was this a polite remonstrance or was it politely dressed?—

A. I do not know what your sense of politeness is; I told him nothing but the truth; and I was urged on to it by the circumstances of the moment. Did he not merit it? Was he not at the very time, sanctioning the lowest opinion I had of his meanness?—Did he not even appeal to me; and in what therefore am I to blame?—

C. Not in your thoughts, but in your words, I allow your opinion of him to be quite right; but I cannot admit that expression of it which you claim.—It interferes with the general good will which should connect all persons together; It breaks the charm, which renders every member of society, a friend to every other Member It destroys intercourse, or makes it difficult: It creates enemies and separates friends; and it converts the pleasant and smooth surface of life which politeness produces, into a stormy and tempestuous ocean.

A. It is not worth while spending more time on the affair—I do not see that I am wrong; so let it pass.

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Michael Faraday’s Mental Exercises
An Artisan Essay-Circle in Regency London
, pp. 68 - 74
Publisher: Liverpool University Press
Print publication year: 2008

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