Our relationships are what give meaning to our lives. They are meant to be sources of love, support and comfort. They are meant to build us up, to keep us going when times are tough, to give us meaning beyond ourselves. Yet in domestic abuse, relationships are used to tear people down, to destroy their sense of self-worth and to coerce them. The trust that is essential for there to be love is turned back on the victim as a weapon of abuse. The home, which should be a place of security and comfort, is turned into a prison. The shared history that should be source of joy becomes a tool of terror. Domestic abuse is a fearful and dreadful thing.

Society has ignored domestic abuse for too long, but worse than that, it is enabled, perpetuated and nourished it. In domestic abuse, the patriarchal forces prevalent throughout society are laid open for all to see in a microcosm. Women must obey men. Women should be servants of men. Women are there for men's enjoyment and to meet their needs. If women dare to depart from these roles, they will be punished and put back in their place. Patriarchy bears its ugliest face.

Children bear the scars of domestic abuse. Living with it infects their every moment, their attitudes, their beliefs and tragically their future. Children are used by abusers as powerful methods of coercive control. We have seen how court proceedings on child welfare have facilitated and enabled this. Women who seek to resist in order to protect their children are falsely labelled as abusers themselves.

The language of human rights is the most effective legal tool on which to build a response to domestic abuse. This recognises the gravity of the wrong done to victims. The language of torture and human and degrading treatment is able to match the horror of the experience of domestic abuse. The language of human rights in modern society highlights the issue that should be one of paramount importance for all governments. All the more so in this context because the state must bear responsibility for the societal forces and legal responses which have allowed domestic abuse to become so prevalent.