Microtextured surfaces are commonly used to study complex hydrodynamic phenomena such as spreading and splashing of liquid droplets. However, although surface topography is known to modify near-surface flow, there is no theory able to quantitatively predict the dramatic changes in dynamics of liquid spreading and splashing. Here, we investigate experimentally water bells formed on micropatterned surfaces in order to characterize the hydrodynamics of inertia-dominated flows through regular porous layers. Water bells are self-suspended catenary-shaped liquid films created when a jet impinges on a horizontal disc called an impactor. We show that the presence of micrometre-sized posts regularly arranged on the impactor results in a decrease of the water bell radius and the loss of axisymmetry as open water bells adopt polygonal shapes. We introduce a simple model that captures the main features of the inertia-dominated flow and reveals the role of the hydrodynamic interactions between neighbouring posts. In addition to their applications for tunable jet atomization, these polygonal sheets provide a paradigmatic system for understanding inertia-dominated flow in porous media.