Love and loss are two sides of the same coin. Patterns of attachment to parents in childhood predict how adults will respond to losses in adult life. Avoidant attachments predict avoidance of closeness, delayed grief and self-reproaches, anxious attachments predict severe and protracted grief, and disorganised attachments predict helplessness and depression. All of these increase vulnerability following unexpected or otherwise traumatic losses. There is no single counselling or therapy that provides a catch-all solution. In the UK, Cruse Bereavement Care provides a flexible response to most problems, but cognitive–behavioural therapy tailored to specific problems may be needed too.